One year ago today, November 14th, was one of the most painful days of my life. I had to say goodbye to my Simon kitty love and help him to Heaven. You can read more about that here.
Though it’s been a year, some days it still feels like it was yesterday. The memories of that day are burned in my brain and my heart forever. Some days the tears will still bubble up out of nowhere and flow when I think of him.
What this tells me about my personal experience of the loss of my pet/my fur baby:
- I loved him so very deeply.
- There absolutely still are days when I would give anything to have him back.
- There are days when I question the decision of was it the right time. But I know it’s part of the grief process and there is no timeline for grief.
- Love didn’t die with him. It lives on and on inside my heart. Yes, he was a cat, but love is love!
- Time eventually heals the brunt of the pain, but time doesn’t diminish the emotion attached to the love of your pet. Particularly not with me as a person who feels very deeply.
Remembering Simon
I think about Simon often, not just on this first anniversary of his passing. And I WANT to think of him. Even if it hurts.
Just because my little love muffin is no longer here to lay on my pillow every night by my side, or I can no longer hear his delightful purr as I rub that favorite spot on his neck, or see his soulful eyes light up when I say his favorite words like Treat and Catnip, or I’m not able to just turn around and kiss that beautiful furry head…it does not mean it’s time to forget. Forgetting is not an option. Simon lives on in my thoughts and my heart.
I have a photo of him along with his ashes in a beautiful heart shaped urn in a special place where he is with me daily. Yes, it makes me sad sometimes to see it, but it is important to me to keep it close because HE was that important to me. If people think that is crazy, I don’t care.
Today I will try hard to remember our special memories together over our 14 years and not focus on the very last memory I have of him.
Simon, my love, mommy misses you like mad and loves you as much as ever. And always will.
Love and Purrs,
Amy
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